What does strength look like in a (business) leader?
As concepts of business leadership evolves, the traditional archetype of a stoic and invulnerable leader is being redefined. Today, successful business leaders are recognizing vulnerability as a powerful tool for personal and organizational growth. In this article, we delve into the reasons why vulnerability is indispensable for business leaders, emphasizing its role in fostering collaboration and enabling rapid growth.
Building Bridges Through Collaboration
To grow beyond themselves, collaboration is required.
One of the fundamental reasons why vulnerability is indispensable for business leaders lies in the necessity for collaboration. In an interconnected global economy, no leader can navigate the complex terrain of business alone. Successful leaders recognize the importance of building strong, collaborative teams to tackle challenges and drive innovation.
Vulnerability becomes the bridge that connects leaders with their teams. It breaks down the barriers that might otherwise hinder open communication and collaboration. When a leader is willing to expose their vulnerabilities, it creates an environment where team members feel encouraged to share their ideas, insights, and concerns. This openness lays the foundation for a collaborative culture that is essential for sustained success.
The Catalyst for Growth: Openness and Constructive Criticism
The fastest way to enable growth is to be willing to share your idea, seek constructive criticism, and implement solutions for improvement.
Growth is a constant pursuit in the business world, and for leaders, the ability to facilitate rapid growth is a key metric of success. Embracing vulnerability becomes a catalyst for this growth by fostering a culture of continuous improvement.
Leaders who are open to sharing their ideas, even when they are in their nascent stages, invite constructive criticism. This willingness to expose their thought processes allows for a more thorough examination of ideas, paving the way for innovation and improvement. Constructive criticism, rather than being perceived as a threat, becomes a valuable tool for refinement and optimization.
Implementing solutions for improvement is another facet where vulnerability plays a pivotal role. A leader who acknowledges their imperfections and is open to feedback is better equipped to implement changes that drive progress. This not only strengthens the leader’s ability to adapt to evolving circumstances but also sets an example for the entire organization.
Overcoming Challenges: What’s the Hardest Part?
Addressing the question – What’s the hardest part about this for you? – opens the door to self-reflection and personal growth.
For many business leaders, the journey toward vulnerability is fraught with challenges. The traditional image of a leader as an all-knowing, unyielding figure can be deeply ingrained. Admitting vulnerability may be seen as a sign of weakness, creating an internal struggle.
The hardest part for many leaders might be overcoming the fear of judgment and relinquishing the illusion of infallibility. It requires a shift in mindset, recognizing that vulnerability is not a weakness but a strength that enhances leadership capabilities. Accepting that one doesn’t have all the answers and being open to learning from others can be a humbling but transformative experience.
Moreover, vulnerability requires a level of self-awareness that not everyone is comfortable with. It demands an honest assessment of one’s strengths and weaknesses, acknowledging areas for improvement. This introspection can be uncomfortable, as it challenges preconceived notions and forces leaders to confront aspects of themselves that they might prefer to ignore.
Another significant hurdle is the fear of losing control. Vulnerability involves relinquishing some degree of control and trusting others to contribute meaningfully. For leaders accustomed to maintaining a tight grip on their organizations, this can be a daunting prospect. However, it is essential to recognize that true strength lies in collaboration and the ability to harness the collective intelligence of a team.
What to Takeaway
To wrap up, the adoption of vulnerability by business leaders is not a sign of weakness but a strategic imperative for success. It serves as a catalyst for collaboration, breaking down barriers and fostering a culture of openness. Embracing vulnerability accelerates growth by inviting constructive criticism and implementing solutions for improvement. The hardest part of this journey may vary for each leader, but the rewards – in terms of personal development and organizational success – make it a venture worth undertaking.
“If the computer moves it’s pawn there, then I can take it with my knight. “
In the rapidly-evolving landscape of technology and artificial intelligence (AI), it’s fascinating to explore the roots of intelligent thought processes that predate the advent of machines. Long before the era of algorithms and neural networks, human beings relied on a powerful tool known as conditional logic to navigate the complexities of life, make decisions, and innovate. In this article, we delve into the concept of conditional logic as the original form of intelligence and its relevance in strategizing, solutioning, and fostering innovation in both business and life.
Understanding Conditional Logic
Conditional logic refers to the ability to reason and make decisions based on specific conditions or criteria. It involves a series of if-then statements (hence “thenHOW”), where actions or outcomes are contingent upon certain circumstances. This form of reasoning has been an integral part of human thought processes for centuries, providing a structured framework for problem-solving and decision-making.
Historical Perspectives
Long before the age of computers and artificial intelligence, ancient philosophers and thinkers employed conditional logic in their quest for understanding the world. Aristotle, one of the most influential philosophers in Western history, used conditional reasoning to develop his syllogistic logic, a method of deducing conclusions from given premises.
For example, Aristotle’s famous syllogism “All men are mortal, Socrates is a man, therefore Socrates is mortal” showcases the essence of conditional logic. This structured approach to reasoning laid the groundwork for subsequent philosophical and scientific advancements.
Conditional Logic in Everyday Decision-Making
The application of conditional logic is not limited to theoretical or philosophical realms; it permeates our everyday decision-making processes. From choosing what to wear based on the weather forecast to deciding whether to invest in a particular business venture, individuals unconsciously utilize conditional reasoning to navigate the myriad choices life presents.
Consider a simple scenario: deciding whether to bring an umbrella before leaving the house. The decision-making process involves assessing the condition (is it raining?), establishing a condition-based rule (if it’s raining, bring an umbrella), and taking the appropriate action. This seemingly straightforward example underscores the ubiquity and practicality of conditional logic in our daily lives.
Conditional Logic in Simple Automation and Excel Formulas
Beyond philosophical and everyday applications, conditional logic plays a pivotal role in simple automation and data manipulation, particularly in tools like Microsoft Excel. In spreadsheet programs, users leverage conditional statements to automate processes, analyze data, and make informed decisions.
For instance, Excel users often employ the “IF” function, a quintessential tool based on conditional logic. This function allows users to specify a condition and define the actions to be taken if that condition is met or not met. This simple yet powerful feature enables users to create dynamic spreadsheets that respond to changing data conditions.
Let’s consider a practical example: a sales spreadsheet with a column indicating whether each sale has met a predefined target. Using the IF function, a user can set a condition to check if the sales value exceeds the target. If the condition is met, the cell can display “Met Target”; otherwise, it can show “Below Target.” This straightforward application of conditional logic automates the process of tracking sales performance and provides instant insights.
Conditional Logic in Home Automation: A Real-life Efficiency Boost
Taking the principles of conditional logic beyond the office and into our homes, we find innovative applications in popular smart home systems like Google Home or Amazon Echo. These devices offer a seamless integration of conditional logic, allowing users to create personalized routines that enhance efficiency and convenience in their daily lives.
Imagine a scenario where you want to optimize your morning routine using a voice-activated smart assistant. With conditional logic, you can create a routine that adapts to different scenarios based on your needs.
IF (Time is 7:00 AM) Turn on bedroom lights Start the coffee maker Provide weather and traffic updates
In this example, the smart assistant checks the time and executes specific automated actions based on the condition. At 7:00 AM, it focuses on actions associated with waking up, such as turning on bedroom lights and starting the coffee maker.
This simple automation not only streamlines your morning routine but also showcases the power of conditional logic in adapting to different circumstances. The flexibility offered by home automation systems empowers users to customize their environment based on specific conditions, ultimately making their lives more efficient and enjoyable.
Strategizing with Conditional Logic
In the realm of business, strategic thinking is crucial for success. Companies and leaders often face complex challenges that require a thoughtful and systematic approach. Conditional logic provides a valuable framework for strategizing, enabling businesses to identify key variables, set conditions for success, and develop contingency plans.
When developing a market entry strategy, for instance, a company may consider various conditions such as the economic environment, cultural factors, and competitors’ actions. By employing conditional logic, the business can formulate a strategy that adapts to different scenarios, allowing for flexibility and resilience in the face of uncertainty.
Solutioning Through Conditional Reasoning
In problem-solving, the ability to analyze different conditions and devise tailored solutions is paramount. Conditional reasoning facilitates a systematic approach to problem-solving, helping individuals and organizations address challenges with clarity and precision.
Imagine a manufacturing company facing a production bottleneck. Using conditional logic, the team can identify the specific conditions contributing to the bottleneck, such as machine downtime, resource shortages, or inefficient processes. By addressing each condition individually, the team can systematically eliminate obstacles and optimize the production process, leading to a more efficient and effective operation.
Innovation Fueled by Conditional Thinking
Innovation is often synonymous with thinking outside the box, but the process of innovation itself can be structured through conditional logic. By identifying conditions conducive to creativity, fostering an environment that nurtures innovation becomes achievable.
Tech giants like Apple have exemplified this approach. Apple’s innovative success can be attributed, in part, to the conditional logic embedded in their design thinking. Steve Jobs famously stated, “Design is not just what it looks like and feels like. Design is how it works.” This statement reflects a deep understanding of the conditional relationships between form and function, aesthetics and usability.
In a constantly changing technological landscape, businesses that embrace conditional thinking are better positioned to adapt and innovate. By anticipating and responding to specific conditions, these companies can proactively shape the future rather than merely reacting to it.
The Evolution of AI and Conditional Logic
The emergence of artificial intelligence has transformed the landscape of problem-solving and decision-making. AI systems leverage advanced algorithms and neural networks to analyze vast amounts of data and make predictions. While these technologies represent a significant leap forward, their underlying principles are rooted in conditional logic.
Machine learning algorithms, for instance, rely on conditional statements to make predictions based on patterns identified in data. The concept of if-then statements, fundamental to conditional logic, is present in the decision trees and rule-based systems that form the backbone of many AI applications.
However, it’s crucial to recognize that the human mind’s innate ability to understand complex conditions, nuances, and emotions remains a unique aspect of actual intelligence. While AI systems excel in processing data and identifying patterns, they may struggle to comprehend the intricacies of human experience and context.
Conclusion
Conditional logic has been an integral part of human thinking for centuries, shaping our approach to problem-solving, decision-making, and innovation. As we navigate the ever-evolving landscape of artificial intelligence, it’s essential to appreciate the enduring relevance of conditional logic in both personal and professional spheres.
In business, strategizing with conditional thinking allows for adaptability and resilience in the face of uncertainty. In problem-solving, conditional reasoning provides a systematic framework for addressing challenges with precision. And in innovation, embracing conditional logic fosters an environment where creativity can flourish.
While AI continues to advance, the foundational principles of conditional logic remain deeply ingrained in our understanding of intelligence. Recognizing and harnessing the power of conditional thinking can enhance our ability to navigate the complexities of the modern world, ensuring that actual (human) intelligence and artificial intelligence work together harmoniously for a more intelligent future.
If you don’t have the option to watch the video because you’re at work or can’t listen to the audio at the moment, below is, essentially, the script for the video.
If you’d like to watch the video on YouTube or engage in the comments, you can watch the video through this link.
Most of us are in pursuit of some sort of transformation. Some are looking for better health and physique. Some want more money and stable finances. Some want a life with more autonomy and freedom, more adventure or travel.
Whatever the transformation is that we are seeking, it usually isn’t something that happens overnight. These transformations take time – enough time that we need to change what we consistently do. We need to change our habits!
The challenge is that our brains and our environment are designed to operate in a certain way, and changing that encounters resistance. The bigger the shift we seek to make, the more resistance we’ll encounter.
If transformation were as simple as wanting something and it just happening, we’d all be and have exactly what we want! But it’s not that simple. So, how do we start and continue the transformation process?
Transformation occurs as we move along a path. The further we go, the greater the transformation. Unfortunately, we don’t always think about the direction each path in life takes us, and it’s not until we look up and see where we are that we choose to change things.
Intentional transformation requires 2 things, prioritizing a direction and a taking one step after another.
This is why I coach people with 4 things in mind…
1st, Prioritization and Personalization. The most important component of progress, is understanding the most important thing – your priorities. Without actively choosing the direction of your life, the world will choose it for you. So, you have to decide what’s most important to you. You need it to be personal. It needs to resonate with you… because when you encounter resistance, when doubt creeps in, your belief in this path is what will give you the strength to press on toward your goal.
2nd, we look to Overcome Obstacles. I already mentioned that change will encounter resistance. Well, there will be obstacles. These can be things like distractions from doing the work you need to do, friends asking you to do things that you don’t want to do anymore, or temptations in your environment to indulge in things that pull you away from your new goals and back toward your old habits. It’s important to acknowledge that these obstacles exist so that you can set up plans for how to avoid them whenever possible and for how to deal with them when they can’t be avoided.
3rd, as you make progress toward your goal, you want to set Meaningful Milestones. These checkpoints help you identify when you’re really progressing toward your goal. They also serve as points to level up your habits. Usually, to shift our habits, we start with tiny changes and gradually build them up. These points of leveling up are significant milestones, encourage us to keep going, and show that we are capable of living the new life we dreamt of.
4th and finally, we look at a long life of leveling-up. We consider all the changes you made, how you picked a path, made micro changes, overcame obstacles, leveled-up and made bigger changes. We look back at how you did this, learn from the successes and failures, so you can plan to keep moving forward, living your new life, doing the things you want to do!
It’s a simple process, and when your habits and goals are approached properly, they become clearly achievable! It still takes some work – don’t assume that it’s always fun and easy – but it’s doable…for anyone! Especially you.
Before you take the next step toward this new life, I want to remind you that every journey is easier and more likely to succeed when you have support, when you have friends taking the journey with you. So, if there’s anyone that you’d like to bring along with you, consider sharing this video with them and tell them you’d like them to join you. You might be pleasantly surprised by their response!
So, if you’d like to get started with your transformation, check out the Healthy Habits page!
Too often, we think that image is everything! Especially on social media, we see people who are “in-shape” without having any idea about what they are actually physically capable of, what’s going on underneath, their quality of life, etc.
Let’s focus less on image and more on functionality!
As always, I hope you find this video useful and am looking for more ways to add value to your life!
If you have questions about health, fitness, strength and conditioning, mobility, nutrition, or anything related, feel free to ask me!
Here’s a brief video on 3 key concepts to consider when thinking about how to be successful in life (or really any endeavor)!
For those who want the notes, here’s a summary of the 3 keys:
Define being successful. Understand that success – or to succeed – simply means to progress or move forward. Think about successors, those who would succeed someone else in a role. (It’s the opposite of a predecessor.) Successors simply follow the predecessor. Therefore, to succeed simply means to come after or to follow. If you’re succeeding, you’re moving on to the next thing.
Furthermore, to be successful simply means that one’s life is full of success! Being successful means that success isn’t a one-time achievement; it’s a life of consistent progress.
Understand how success works. More specifically, understand that success means moving forward or moving onward. Regardless of failures, mistakes, and obstacles, as long as we continue to move forward, we are succeeding.
Decide how you measure success in your own life. Every society and culture has its own concepts of success. In much of the world (particularly in the age of technology and social media), success is measured in dollars and social following. However, these metrics are largely temporary and empty. My suggestion is to discover what’s truly meaningful in your own life, and learn how to increase abundance of those things!
If you know what is or isn’t important to you but are just feeling stuck or stagnant and need help making progress, shoot me a message letting me know what you want some help with!
Here’s a video to address this question. In it, I discuss some core principles of effective coaching, things to look out for (i.e. pitfalls of poor coaching), and what any online coach should consider to be effective in helping a client achieve results.
For those who can’t watch the video right now or would like the notes (and some additional thoughts), here are the general points…
CORE PRINCIPLES
Effective coaching requires the following in order develop or progress the client toward a goal:
Observation by the coach. A coach needs to be able to observe what the client is doing!
Feedback from the coach. A coach needs to be able to provide instructive and constructive feedback to the client.
A system that facilitates effective communication between both the coach and the client.
INEFFECTIVE COACHING
Here’s the sad truth about coaching. Not all coaches actually coach! A lot of people (most, with good intentions) put together programs or products, call it “coaching”, and send it to consumers either to help the masses or just to make an easy buck.
For now, let’s assume and ignore those who intentionally mislead people by using buzzwords or terminology to bait, mislead, or deceive desperate consumers. There are still those who either make the following mistakes or provide services or products that are mislabeled or misunderstood to be “coaching”. Here are some highlights.
Coaches using systems, platforms, apps, tools, etc. that don’t capture relevant data and information to allow for valuable observation and insight on the client’s progress.
Coaches using a system that clients can’t or won’t use. There are some fancy tools and apps out there, but if it’s too complex for the client to adopt, the client won’t use it. This means clients miss out on results and coaches spin their wheels pushing clients to adopt the system. At worst, both parties end up frustrated and leave on bad terms.
Coaches using blanket systems, methods, and tactics on every client. These coaches use 1 system for everyone and expect similar results. On the flip side, clients go in seeing results from select individuals and expect similar results for themselves. When expectations aren’t met, clients are usually the ones most frustrated and disappointed.
“Coaches” who send out templated programs or videos to clients with no communication and call it coaching.
Coaches to send out motivational message or videos without addressing areas for improvement (as needed).
Coaches who confuse accountability with a coaching session. Clients are partially responsible as well, but it’s up to the coach to make the clarification. While holding clients accountable is part of coaching, there’s much more to it. Clients often (though, not always) think that all they need is someone to hold them accountable. Not only is this incomplete, it usually fails to address the root causes and fixes around client habits and behaviors.
Fitness “coaches” who just shout instructions and encouragement at clients during workouts. This mostly pertains to personal trainers and workout video hosts, but the point is that a real coach does a lot more than share enthusiasm. Coaches should be watching clients move and ensure proper form, pacing, etc. If you want a personal trainer or someone to host a workout session, great! Just don’t confuse that with coaching.
EFFECTIVE COACHING
Clearly, there are a host of things that fall short of proper coaching, so what should you look for in a good online coaching service?
Coaches that use communication systems that capture relevant information that can provide insight into if, how, and why clients are or are not progressing toward their goal(s).
Coaches that use systems for effective communication between themselves and the clients.
Coaches who can communicate in such a way that the client clearly understands coach guidance. Clients should feel encouraged and challenged. After all, the main reason clients get coaching is to push or pull them further than they would likely go alone.
Obviously, this isn’t an exhaustive list, but it should help you better identify good or poor coaching when you see it.
That said, not all good coaching looks the same. More importantly, every coach is different as is every client! The best coach in the world may not be right for you, and just because you might be an ideal (i.e. coachable) client, it doesn’t mean you are the best client for a coach. (Yes, it goes both ways. If a coach doesn’t vet you first, watch out!)
If you’d like more information or would like to see if you’d be a good fit with me at thenHOW Coaching, please contact me!
While this is actually the 3rd video I’ve put on Youtube (and the 1st I’ve put on the site), I wanted to share here for those of you who may not yet subscribe to my channel there. (Wink wink)
This video is for you if you’re considering…
Going down a new path in life
Starting a new job or career
Starting a business
Moving to a new place
Starting a new relationship
Trying something risky
How to get back on track in life, health, business, mentally, financially, etc.
In the video, I’ll talk about…
How to prepare for a new path wisely
How to look out for and support someone trying something new
The realities of getting back on track when you find yourself in a less than desirable place
Many of us grew up hearing, “Look both ways before crossing the street!” Mid-run, as we barreled toward the road, one of our parents would holler at us, reminding us to be safe, looking before we leap, so to speak.
Some of us might have been told, “Don’t forget to stop and look both ways. Then, if it’s safe, and there are no cars coming, you can cross the street.”
Now, you might be thinking, “That’s pretty much the same thing.” Pretty much, yes; the gist is the same. However, there are a few seemingly minor differences that go much deeper into the messages communicated.
In the first version, it’s implied that crossing the street is going to happen and that to keep us safe, we need to do something first. The second message has something rather sinister lurking within. Instead of assuming we will progress across the street, we’re told to stop, first. We’re told to review the situation. Then, we have to perform an analysis of it’s safety. If our calculations are favorable, we can re-evaluate our decision and are granted permission to proceed across the street.
So, what’s different? Not only did it take a lot longer to explain the sequence of the second message, it contains subtle inhibitors to progress.
Stop (The initial – and most obvious – inhibitor of progress. Side note: Stopping isn’t even always necessary.)
Review (Useful but time-consuming)
Analyze (Again, time-consuming. Plus, who knows how long we might take to form an assessment when we get caught up in the variables?)
Re-evaluate (Now, we allow doubt to creep in. Instead of assuming we will cross, we have to question if crossing is even something we want to do.)
Await permission (In this case, permission is given by the instructor and is conditional upon the previous criteria, safe crossing conditions.)
Each of those, in some way, slows down progress. Admittedly, I may be exaggerating the situation a bit, but the principles carry into an infinite number of other scenarios where the impacts of each of these thought processes is increased.
Now, before I continue, let me say that I am likely guilty of giving this type of instruction. It may be because I receive instruction like this often, and I end up reflecting it onto others. Either way, I know that I’m guilty of internalizing this as is evident in my proclivity to over-analyze, over-think, and not take action. (See Analysis Paralysis) While I find great value in identifying risks and obstacles to ensure a clear path, this (sometimes) obsession with “what-if”s too often results in me not taking any action due to the possibility of resistance. Ironic, right? The greatest obstacle or resistance is coming from me. With that said, let’s get back to the practical examples.
Previously, I mentioned that those principles can show up elsewhere. Where? In almost every act or decision we make. Of course, if we gave that much analytical thinking to everything, we’d freeze up and die, so while it probably doesn’t happen in every situation, there’s likely an argument that it could show up in any situation.
To give some common examples, it can show up in decisions to improve eating habits, start a new job, make purchase, write an article, or even post a picture on social media. Consider how often we’re told to “stop eating junk food” instead of “eat more leafy greens and protein”. This leads to people being even more hungry and frustrated than they were before, and they don’t even see the results they wanted!
What about changing jobs? “Don’t quit your job! Think about the benefits you might miss out on.” “What if you don’t end up liking your next job, or what if you fail?” How many people do you think stay unproductive in jobs they don’t like because of those fears instilled within them by others?
Don’t overspend on a purchase. Don’t publish something off-brand. Don’t post unless the photo looks professionally edited or, at least, shows only your best features. What if instead of being told or thinking about what not to do (and doing nothing), we reframed these instructions into how to do those things.
Don’t…
Do…
Don’t eat junk food.
Eat more meats and veggies.
Don’t quit your job.
Find a good opportunity before you quit your job.
Don’t overspend on things.
Buy valuable things with a fair price.
Don’t publish something off-brand.
Publish articles with an authentic perspective.
Don’t post unless…
Post your favorite…
These convey the point that each negative, inhibiting thought can be reframed into a positive, encouraging one.
What are some actionable take-aways to start doing more?
When you hear someone tell you – or worse, you tell someone else – “Don’t…”, try to immediately flip it to a positive action.
When you stop yourself from taking action out of fear of what could happen, assume that you will overcome any obstacle and that your progress is inevitable. The path you take may change, but you will get there. (I.e., you will cross the street. You may want to look first, but you will leap!)
Give yourself permission! Even if there’s a fear of failure, (while you don’t need my permission to do so,) you have permission to fail! You have permission to do things, and when the responsibilities are yours and the consequences of your decisions impact you, you don’t need permission from others. *Reframe: …you can proceed without permission from others.)
The reality of time is that it will pass, regardless of our action or inaction. That means that even when we are doing “nothing”, we are doing nothing. We can’t not do. (A double-negative is a positive, but it can still feel negative.) We do things, always. Time moves on either way, so we might as well make progress.
If you would like help reviewing your own self-talk or making progress on a goal of your own, you can check out my latest coaching offer or contact me with any questions!
Disclaimer: This article does contain Amazon Affiliate links. Side note: I only include references to products I find value in. If you’re not interested, just enjoy the article! If you want to buy the item and the best value is through my link, I will appreciate the support.
Jessie sees Willy, the orca with whom he shares a special bond. Jessie hasn’t seen the whale in several years, until now, and Willy’s pod (a.k.a. family) is hunting. Randolph, the trusted friend, mentor, and boat captain, tells Jessie, “They’re hunting now. We’ll come back tomorrow.”
Jessie asks, “What time?”
Randolph responds, “Very early.”
Jessie acknowledges with an emphatic “Yes!”
If you didn’t grow up in the 90s or for some other reason, you haven’t seen Free Willy or Free Willy 2, which this is from, I highly recommend them! Free Willy 3 wasn’t bad either. Let’s not talk about the 4th movie, unless you need closure on the series and want the package set.
I don’t know if you’re an early bird or a night owl. Me? I’m firmly on the night owl side. I prefer staying up late and sleeping in until my body says I’m rested enough to take on the next day. So, when I heard Jessie’s excitement at waking up early, I understood why he was excited but knew that my default is usually less keen on early mornings.
In fact, growing up, my dad used to take my brother and me fishing on the weekends. (Well, he still tries to get me to go any chance he gets.) I remember so many early mornings waking up to him getting ready in the motel room in whatever Texas coastal town we were visiting and just wishing he’d be quieter so I could sleep in another three or four minutes… or hours. Naturally, the best fishing was usually right around sunrise, so sleeping in more than three or four minutes wasn’t really an option for me. I would begrudgingly roll out of bed, pull my clothes over my lethargic body, and drag my feet from the room to the truck and the boat. I enjoyed fishing and the reward of catching fish by being in the right spot at the right time, but you still couldn’t convince me that getting up early was something to look forward to!
Now, as an adult, I’m used to dragging myself out of bed. I know what happens if I allow myself to sleep in and what I’ll miss out on if I do. I know that I have to go to work on-time. I know that getting to the fish when they’re biting gives me much better odds of catching one. Now that I know that, I can plan ahead. I can go to bed earlier, even if it still takes a while for me to actually fall asleep. I can change my routine, my beliefs, and my behavior to my benefit.
Here’s what we can take from these examples. Understanding others’ perspectives can evolve our own ways of thinking. Asking questions about why someone would do something you wouldn’t do can change your own way of thinking. It comes down to understanding others’ perspectives, not judging them.
Whether the other person is someone in a movie who wants to get up early to see his killer whale friend or is your father who gets up early to be on the water at sunrise, we can learn something. These are, in my opinion, the relatively easy differences to tackle. So, what about the hard ones?
What about differences in religion or culture? What about the opinions of those who are part of a different demographic, who had a different upbringing, who lived a different childhood and adulthood? Can we still approach these differences the same way? It’s not that easy, is it? We can’t overcome decades or centuries of differences by reading an article and trying to follow the suggestions of that one guy!
Why not? I’ll seek to understand your perspective if you seek to understand mine. And that’s the point!
It’s about seeking to understand the perspectives of others, not about placing barriers of prejudice around them. Don’t get me wrong; I definitely judge others. Yep, I admit it. I do. I have biases. I was raised to believe certain things, and you may not agree with them. That’s okay. The positive thing about me sharing this is that I’m aware of it, and that awareness is what allows me to challenge myself, my understandings, my beliefs, and to grow as I better understand others.
Still, sometimes, I don’t agree with others’ perspectives. For example, I don’t fully align with why some people buy luxury cars. I don’t need a premium package or all the bells and whistles. I had a moon-roof on a car once. It never served me. I didn’t like having it open…ever. I would have been happier without it. But… just because I don’t need it and don’t get why someone would spend extra money for a premium feature when I prefer functionality (and yes, I realize it’s not that clear-cut and that there’s plenty of overlap), that doesn’t mean that luxuries are inherently wrong. It doesn’t mean that moon-roofs are pointless. I may fail to see the point, but that doesn’t mean one doesn’t exist.
So enough about cars and fish… What can we take away from this that will serve us? How do we actually tackle the big issues? How do we improve our lives and the lives of others?
Here’s what can be done when you encounter a difference of opinion.
Pause. Stop judging.
Ask questions. Seek understanding.
Question your own thoughts and beliefs.
Ask yourself, “Can I benefit by adjusting my thoughts and beliefs?”
What can you take away from the perspective of others and use to evolve your own? Taking those few (or many) moments to pause, reflect, and seek to understand has the potential to improve not just how and when we wake up but how we approach our relationships, our daily decisions, and how we live out our lives. This is how we advance the human race.
So, are you listening? Are you asking questions? What’s one thing that you wish you could change? What simple practice do you wish you could change but believe you can’t?
Do you wish you could wake up earlier but don’t want to?
Do you wish you could be more active but prefer to sit on the couch, watching TV?
Do you wish politics weren’t so problematic but you “know” they’ll never get better?
Do you wish your neighbors didn’t act the way they do, but feel like there’s nothing that can be done about it?
…
What if you could change that? What would you change? What perspective do you need to challenge of your own, and whose perspective do you need to better understand?
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Look in the side mirror. Maybe check the rear-view mirror? Yeah, best do it, just in case. Check over the shoulder for the blind spot. Turn on the turn signal light… or is the signal before you check your mirrors? Oh, well. Then, I can change lanes. Now, do I have to stop and turn off and on the signal in each lane, or can I just keep going? Umm… oh, crap… I missed my exit!
That’s basically analysis paralysis. It’s a situation or task you analyze so much that you can’t do it at all. Analysis paralysis is a plague that seems to affect the thoughtful, those who care, those who want to do things the right way or who want to make the right decisions. It may show up in a number of things! I’ll hit on a few examples in this article because analysis paralysis can affect all of us, but it doesn’t have to.
Some of you may lift weights; some don’t. Some of you may be CrossFitters; most aren’t. Some of you may have at least seen Olympic weightlifting on TV or social media. Well, if you haven’t, just YouTube it. The reason I bring it up is because the Olympic lifts – the Clean & Jerk and the Snatch – are probably two of the most complex movements in an exercise repertoire. To make it simple (Hint: that’ll be on the quiz, later), the clean is just picking something off the ground to the shoulders, and the jerk is pressing that object overhead while getting underneath it. The snatch is just doing the same thing without stopping it at the shoulders.
Okay. Now, some of the Oly lifters reading this just lost their minds because that horribly underrepresents the technique, finesse, and skill required to perform these magnificent movements! Well, that’s the problem! Yes, these lifts literally take years to execute properly, and the perfect form is highly subjective. Examining just the snatch, you have to be mindful of the following performance points: the wrist over the bars, knuckles under the bar, the lat engagement, the stance, the first pull, second pull, third pull, the shrug, the shoulder activation, the squat, the lock out, the pause at the bottom, the final rise to glory!
OMG!!! Now that you’ve read that and once someone explains it all to you, you can do the lift, right? Ha! This is why so many people don’t even bother trying to learn the lift. It’s just too much! As an athlete, I’ve over-analyzed these myself. As a coach, I’ve been guilty of telling someone too much too fast. Again, these lifts don’t have to be so complicated, and I’ll explain how later.
Unless you’re under 16 years old, a New Yorker, or outside the U.S., you have probably driven a car. You probably remember your driving lessons. Maybe your parents put you in the parking lot and gave you the scary, constant corrections and instructions. Maybe you took lessons at a driving school and were taught the acronyms of how to start the car or how to change lanes. (SMOG – Signal, Mirrors, Over the shoulder, Go! Even I can’t believe I still remember that one.) Maybe you, like me, also ride a motorcycle. Maybe you can drive a stick-shift (aka manual transmission).
In any case, you’ll recall the many considerations to be mindful of in given scenarios. Heck, even going straight, you had to keep hands at 10 and 2, occasionally check the mirrors to be aware of surroundings, and keep a distance of 1 car length per 10 mph you were going at any given time to ensure you had enough distance to brake without hitting the car in front of you. Eventually, after a year or so, it got easier. We’ll touch on that soon.
Now, where else does analysis paralysis show up frequently? If you avoid the weightlifting platform and don’t have to drive anywhere, can you avoid it? Probably not. It shows up all the time! It keeps us from picking a college to attend, from choosing a career path, from deciding to get married or not, even from picking which toothpaste to get from the store!
As a quick note, this isn’t the same thing as decision fatigue, where the decisions made over the course of a day tire us out the point that we struggle to make any more. This is an overload of the brain in an instant. This is trying to cram too much data through a processor that just can’t handle the load and the inputs.
The brain has built in systems to prevent too much data from going through. Case in point, consider what physical sensations you have right now. Can you feel any joint pain or aching? Can you feel the pressure of your seat or the floor under you? If you hit your elbow against the wall, clap your hands, or bite your tongue, are you still aware of all the other lesser sensations? Probably not. Why? The brain can only take so much input in a given moment before it shuts down. Pain is just a data input, similar to the data of remembering all the requirements of a lift or of driving. There’s only so much we can handle.
So, how do we handle it? How do we avoid the paralysis? Even more, how can we perform and make improvements? Simply.
That’s all… Keep it simple. Start with one thing and master it. Once it’s second-nature, add something else.
When you lift a weight, start light. Break down each component; it doesn’t matter where you start, really. Just master one thing, and add another. Connect the two, and add something else. Eventually, you will master the full movement.
When you were learning to drive (if you learned), it was a lot to take in at once, so you took it slowly. You focused. You avoided distractions. You might have been taught to not have others in the car with you for a while or to keep the radio down. All so you could focus. Eventually, things became natural. You just innately knew what to do. It was like riding a bike, as they say. (That could have been an article in itself!)
What about life decisions? What about the daily challenges that we face? How do we handle them? Simply.
Again, keep it simple. This could be done in a lot of different ways, but I’ll propose one model for you that I use myself and with clients I coach.
Start with priorities. Outline for yourself what is most important to you. Develop that into your identity.
Who are you? What are you? How does that type of person act? What kinds of things does that person do and avoid? What do you allow, and what are your limits and boundaries?
From there, it’s fairly simple. When faced with a decision, you just run the options through your identity filter. (Maybe I’ll trademark that.) Rather that thinking about all the pros and cons, the what-ifs, the what-abouts, just simply ask if that person would choose it. Yes or No. FYI, adding in Maybe to your list only complicates things, so try to avoid it.
“For the meaning of life differs from man to man, from day to day and from hour to hour. What matters, therefore is not the meaning of life in general but rather the specific meaning of a person’s life at a given moment.” (pg. 108)
Admittedly, I’m probably more guilty of over-analyzing things than most. I can’t tell you how many years I wasted (okay, it was probably about 9) thinking about what I was meant to do, what I was placed on this earth to do. Years were spent doing little other than thinking about what my life’s purpose could be instead of just living purposefully. Trying to analyze all of life’s inputs (yes, all of them) to come up with a single purpose that will direct every decision you make from now on is overwhelming. So much so that it prevents us from doing anything at all. Guess what, if I figured anything out about life’s purpose, it’s this… doing nothing but thinking isn’t life’s purpose.
If there are too many inputs, too many variables, or too many options, then how do we move forward? Essentially, don’t overthink it. Just take on one thing at a time. There’s plenty of time to get around to the rest, but there isn’t time to waste being paralyzed. Get moving, one step at a time.
